Nothing?

I have a confession to make!
This blog is not really about nothing in particular.....
it's actually about ME!

I think blogging is kind of a narcissistic behavior. You write because you want to share things about yourself-your opinions, thoughts, issues of importance. Some people want to gain popularity-as in followers and ad dollars. Other people write to display their brilliance and skill at writing. Still others write as a way to make their mark on their world: "I exist," they say, "Listen to me. I am here."
And still others do it because....well, I don't know why.

I was just thinking about this because I was reading a post written by J-Train about potential topics.
She likes to write to appeal to a wide variety of readers, and maybe capture a few new ones. I am an avid reader and I greatly enjoy her posts.
I just happened to realize that I don't really care if anyone reads this. I don't care that people know about my writing brilliance (although I do think I have a sort of flair-perhaps that is just my conceit) I just like to update sometimes. To keep a record of my thoughts....which are usually about nothing in particular, but it always comes back to me. :-)

Archiving

I finally started archiving my old blog in a Google Doc. I have finished July and August 2003 so far. It has been interesting reviewing what I wrote.

I am glad that it's still there.

I don't blog as much as I used to, as most of you know. Too many other social networks and all that. I also feel like I have finally reached a stable point-good job, good guy, place to live, etc. So I'm not really as interesting as I used to be.
That's a good thing though. I had fun back in the day, but I also had a lot of really depressing, terrible, no good, very bad times. I don't have regrets about it-in fact, I'm glad I had those times. The crazy times, as I like to call them. I feel like I came through ok and I am glad that I have reached a point where every day is no longer an emotional roller coaster.
I have reached a point where I can work on developing my interests, instead of developing my existence, if that makes sense. I read so much more than I used to-I pay attention to the news (well, NPR, I refuse to watch TV news). I have opinions about things-from literature to movies to TV to military policies.
Also my History degree allows me a really good perspective. It helps in work, but it also helps in life. I see nuances to things. I don't see the world in a linear way, as a system of cause and effect. I look for connections.
I am, I think, a lot more opinionated than I used to be. I used to feel fearful at expressing myself, but I think that I am a much stronger communicator. Perhaps this is the confidence that comes from getting older? Who knows. I know that things could change at any moment, but I have the mental strength to handle it. I still have a lot to look forward too as well!
What I do know is that I am happy that I am not 22 anymore. I wouldn't wish that on anyone. And I hope it will make me sympathetic to my future offspring-Just need to keep things in perspective.

Song for the Weekend

Calvin Harris-Ready for the Weekend


Counterfeit, counterfeit
That's what you're shouting at me
I could run but I'd sooner have this
End amicably.
Lick the blood stain from your finger
Say what do you see?
Remind you that whatever you get is
What you want it to be

You want it to be
You get a feeling, that's what you choose
And I was told there is not a minute to lose
So if you're waiting, jump out your skin
To find a cure for whatever state your in
I tell my good friends get out the way!
Of all the lightning hitting the trees today
We get a thrill from clapping our hands
We find the nearest girl
And ask her to dance

Ohhh I put on my shoes and I'm ready for the weekend
Ouuw I put on my shoes and I'm ready for the weekend
Ouuw I put on my shoes and I'm ready for the weekend
Ouuw I put on my shoes and I'm ready for the weekend
Weekend, weekend, weekend...

Coming back coming back
To a place where, I never knew
Pushing knobs, pushing faders
But I don't know what they do
This reflection in my mirror, reminds me of you.
When I tilt it towards the sunlight, you fall out of view
You fall out of view!

You get a feeling, that's what you choose.
And I was told there is not a minute to lose
So if you're waiting, jump out your skin
To find a cure for whatever state you're in
I tell my good friends get out the way!
Of all the lightning hitting the trees today
We get a thrill from clappin our hands
We find the nearest girl
And ask her to dance

Ohhh I put on my shoes and I'm ready for the weekend
Ouuw I put on my shoes and I'm ready for the weekend
Ouuw I put on my shoes and I'm ready for the weekend
Ouuw I put on my shoes and I'm ready for the weekend
Weekend, weekend, weekend...